You feel so, so sick. You don’t want to have to do this ever again.
You want a special dispensation from God to avoid food.
Archive for October, 2008
XXXXVIII
Posted in mia, tagged bulimia on October 15, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
XXXXVII
Posted in mia, tagged bulimia on October 14, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
When you start on food after all that restricting, you realise you have no idea how to use it effectively. You are totally out of control.
You think: it’s quite probable you’d have fewer health problems if you didn’t eat at all, even taking into account hospitalisation when your body weight drops. On the one hand [...]
XXXXVI
Posted in mia, tagged bulimia on October 13, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
There are many roads that lead to anorexia, but there’s an anorexic type: people who, once they have started restricting, find it good to abstain from food. They are sustained by their abstinence. It’s a brain thing. Just is.
Then some people exhibit anorexic behaviour without this. They’re just as anorexic — anorexia’s a syndrome — [...]
XXXXV
Posted in mia, tagged bulimia on October 11, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
The pleasure from food feeds on food. After abstaining you don’t want it or enjoy it — that’s pleasure snatched away. The solution to not eating is not eating. Both bingeing and restricting behaviours are runaways.
Anorexics have a stronger pleasure in not eating. Bulimics desire the sensual and earthy pleasures of food. Less spiritual, less [...]
XXXXIV
Posted in mia, tagged bulimia on October 10, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
You get a bulimic rush from food.
Too much pleasure in it.
You won’t be anorexic, however little you eat. The disorders are related but distinct. You’ll be a bulimic who’s self-starving.
Every day you get closer to the perfect, classic, and stereotyped relation of the bulimic to food.
